Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Serious Knife Brandishing Skills

As some of you know, I am on vacation in Lincoln City, OR. By myself. I know, I know, I'm either crazy or a hermit-wannabe, right? Nope, none of the above. Just someone who likes a little alone time every so often and decided that the decade-long dream to vacation by herself should not go unfulfilled. Hence, this week.

It all started out peacefully enough, with a trip down I-5. After hitting Portland however, things got a wee bit dicey. I swear by Google (and have been known to claim that I would marry it if it were a man), but it led me astray. A few wrong directions and I was a wee bit off course. Praise Jesus that my savior was the innate sense of direction that never steers me wrong (is that sacrelige to say-- Jesus/savior?). I only stopped once to ask for directions and was informed that if I simply looked out the window, I would see the street I needed. I did feel a little sheepish about that.

One of my more pronounced fears is the one of heights. They make me paralyzed and became the direct cause of another category of Angie hand injuries-- gripping-steering-wheel-itis. This joins the likes of cell-phone-thumb-itis (from constantly being on my work cell phone) & holding-book-one-handed-itis (self explanatory). Driving over mountainous roads going around a bend at 55 mph with a cliff on one side of you while praying, "God, why didn't you make the speed limit lower?" causes one to clutch tightly to the wheel, which in turn causes shooting pain to radiate up one's arms. Yes people, that tightly.

After getting here, it has been all fun and games. I took 4 books with me and debated if it was enough (after all, I've been known to devour 5 books in 3 days before) but quickly came to the conclusion that I wasn't even going to finish one book. I mean really, we don't get tv at home, so I have to stock up on it here. I've been watching a ton of trashy tv, with my favorite being Millionaire Matchmaker. Basically millionaires get matched up with young hot women, which prompted a conversation between me and Jess where we decided that while I wouldn't want to be on that s
how, I could totally do it because I'm nothing but arm candy. Absorb that people. Arm candy. Me. I really like the way that sounds.

Oh wow, this is getting long so I must get on to the story that prompted the title of this post... In between watching trash & barely reading, I have been walking the beach. On one particular occasion, I was forced to change course
s when I happened upon a young man who was yelling obscenities at his friends. As I watched, he pulled out a knife and started threatening them while screaming that one of them just tried to kill him. "F**k you, I can't trust you anymore, you just tried to kill me, did you hear that, he just tried to f**king kill me..." On and on and on he went. It got very tiresome because from my observations of the incident, they had been calmly sitting. No one tried to kill anybody. I'm pretty sure the guy was on a trip of some sort. And I don't mean the vacation variety.

Welp, I leave you with a picture of what I have been able to experience here. You can click on it to see more if you like. It has been wonderful and I will be sad to leave tomorrow!

1 comment:

NatiliaVish said...

Yes, you are more than capable of being "arm candy". :) If necessary, might I recommend brandishing a pocketknife? Like a tiny one, that goes on your keychain, not the big one that actually has a real knife on it. I always thought it would be funny to threaten someone with a keychain pocketknife, even more after they confiscated mine at the airport (apparently it's a "weapon"). Now I never have tweezers when I need them.